A work in progress.

18th December 2011

Photo with 9 notes

The Butterfly Effect. A term coined by sensitive dependence on initial conditions; where a small change at one place in a nonlinear system can result in large differences to a later state. In simpler words, it’s dead-on equivalent to everything happens for a reason. Like said, maybe we were supposed to think we weren’t meant for each other. Maybe we were supposed to bring each other so low and pretend there was no more love to scrape out in hopes that by pretending, it would become realistic— out of sight and out of mind. Because we’ve been walking in circles and found the starting line at the finish line. I can’t help but wonder if we are supposed to be here… It is entirely possible to move on, isn’t it? Perhaps I didn’t try hard enough. I’m sure if I stopped answering your phone calls and text messages, moved out of this small town, archived our memories from my mind, engaged in a handful of reckless one-night stands, and just stop feeling all feelings, I would learn to never want you again. Right? I hate hearing real-life examples of “the one who got away.” It makes me cringe because I don’t want to be a living example of the latter. Every guy I met, I found myself trying to find bits and pieces of you. Too short, too dull, horrible taste in music, not funny enough. I found someone who was straight out of a fairy tale. No door went unopened for me and no check at dinner was left in my hands. There was still one problem though— he just wasn’t you. To end the year the exact same way that I started, even though I spent so much time in between thinking it’ll never happen again, can easily be deemed as selfish… All the same, it’s kind of amazing.

The Butterfly Effect. A term coined by sensitive dependence on initial conditions; where a small change at one place in a nonlinear system can result in large differences to a later state. In simpler words, it’s dead-on equivalent to everything happens for a reason.

Like said, maybe we were supposed to think we weren’t meant for each other. Maybe we were supposed to bring each other so low and pretend there was no more love to scrape out in hopes that by pretending, it would become realistic— out of sight and out of mind. Because we’ve been walking in circles and found the starting line at the finish line. I can’t help but wonder if we are supposed to be here…

It is entirely possible to move on, isn’t it? Perhaps I didn’t try hard enough. I’m sure if I stopped answering your phone calls and text messages, moved out of this small town, archived our memories from my mind, engaged in a handful of reckless one-night stands, and just stop feeling all feelings, I would learn to never want you again. Right?

I hate hearing real-life examples of “the one who got away.” It makes me cringe because I don’t want to be a living example of the latter. Every guy I met, I found myself trying to find bits and pieces of you. Too short, too dull, horrible taste in music, not funny enough. I found someone who was straight out of a fairy tale. No door went unopened for me and no check at dinner was left in my hands. There was still one problem though— he just wasn’t you.

To end the year the exact same way that I started, even though I spent so much time in between thinking it’ll never happen again, can easily be deemed as selfish… All the same, it’s kind of amazing.

  1. gidgeylouisfendiprada posted this